Secret Message To My Gay Lobby Friends

CBS News | Alabama Bill Targets Gay Authors | April 28, 2005 19:30:27

Shhh...be very quiet. My gay blog readers...the plan is ready to go. We meet where the ducks quack and the eagle soars lightly above the loafers.

We shall tie up all the straight people and expose them to our sodomistic lifestyle. We will expose the men to 96 consecutive hours of Richard Simmons' aerobics videos and the women shall be forced to watch "that classic scene" in Mulholland Drive.

But...SHHHHHHHH...don't let anyone know.

Once phase 1 is complete...shhhhh...we will single out the authors and force them to make their book's characters gay. We will find the animators and make them add gay characters like Tinky Winky and Sponge Bob to their shows.

We'll also paint everyone's car neon pink and add rainbow antenna shwag.

The world will be ours in its gay glory! Push the agenda...